Life After Faith (Follow Up)

So I didn't intend on keeping this going, but I've had so many thoughts about this over the past week I wanted to get them down "on paper" so to speak.

First of all, thank you to everyone who commented on the last post. Either online or in person. Both sides of the fence were equally represented and all of you gave me a ton to think about. From the faithful, the overall message I got was that God is still there, whether I believe in him or not. Not only is he there, as one reader suggested, but he is happy with me for exploring my faith so deeply, and scrutinizing the things I believe in. It makes it more real if I do come back to faith.

So to the faithful, I extend my humblest thanks for your encouraging message. Thank you for not chastising me and making me feel stupid for unloading my soul on the internet. Also I'd like to say that you very well may be absolutely right. I might just be in a "dark night of the soul" - as one theologian called it - and God is just waiting with open arms on the other side of my disbelief. That image is wholly comforting, but currently out of reach for me.

To those of you who expressed that you were feeling the same way as I was, thank you. I got comments from former fellow Hardcore-Christians, as well as people who never believed in any of this, but kinda landed in the same place I did after reading the Bible. Opposite starting points, same destination. Kinda funny how that works out.

Again, thanks to all of you who took the time to write something back. Some of you wrote a ton and just that you would take the time out to help me with this is the mark of a true Christian.

_______________________

It was really interesting talking to people in this last week who shared their stories of how they lost their faith. From the scandals in the Catholic church, to unanswered questions about the Bible, to the way Christianity appears to be in bed with politics, to simply seeing bad people sitting next to them in church, everyone seemed to have a specific reason that they could pinpoint for making God disappear from their lives - and yet I couldn't express a reason why I was experiencing the same disbelief they had. 

I went to an amazing church filled with humble, selfless Christians. I never felt like God had let me down or promised me something that didn't happen. I knew about the Catholic sex scandals and I saw the way politicians used their faith in the wrong ways, and that stuff angered me more than anything because it portrayed us Christians in a bad light, but that anger only strengthened my faith. I made it a point to show non-believers that I was a Christian and that I wasn't anti-gay, that I didn't let my faith determine who I voted for, and that we weren't all assholes. I felt like the ambassador for a God who's followers are becoming more and more disliked as the years go on. (I still plan on being that ambassador to let other know that there are good Christians out there.)

So if my faith was so strong in spite of the circumstances, what happened? I don't know. I can't really say anything specifically. It was a culmination of a lot of little things, I guess. Things that didn't add up in the Bible. Rationalizing the miracles and supernatural stories with logical answers. So it wasn't like a huge blow out breakup. I'm not mad at God or Christians or anything. I simply don't believe the magical stuff anymore. But then why does it still feel like a breakup?

Every day now on my car ride home from work, I get sad. Solo car rides used to be my time with God. I would confess my sins, pray for things, and think about big theological questions. Now its just me, and it is the exact same sadness someone would get from breaking up with a girlfriend only 10x worse.

But then I get home and see my wife and my dog. I see my friends at work and at my gym and on weekends. I see my family and nieces and nephews and realize I can still serve this people the same way I did when I was Christian. Maybe even more so now. 

_______________________

Again, I'm not sure where I'm going with this evolved version of the Bible Adventure. What I don't want it to be is any sort of recruitment for my disbelief. In fact, I hope that through my disbelief, you of faith will be strengthened, just as I was when defending my faith to my friends. I think what I'd like it to be is a continual discussion. Please keep commenting and talking with me in person - I love discussing this stuff. I would love to reach a firm conclusion on one side or the other. 

I'll leave you with a song that sums up everything I'm feeling right now.

But, Jesus I've fallen
I don't mind the rain if
I meet my maker
I'll meet my maker clean

But, Jesus the truth is
I've struggled so hard to believe
I'll meet my maker
I'll need my maker

To cure of my doubting blood
And drain me of the sins I love
And take from me my disbelief
I know it should come easily
But it remains inside of me
It battles and devours me
It cuddles up the side of me
And whispers it convinces me I'm

Right 

Life After Faith...

It has been a while.

I've been delaying this wrap-up post now for nearly nine months. Mostly because I'm afraid of what will come out as I write. But here we go...

If you followed this blog in 2010, you might have seen a steady deterioration of my faith as I progressed through the story of the Bible, and it all kinda culminated in the post from December 18 where my faith slipped through my fingers right in front of me. Throughout the last year, questions were raised and left unanswered. I approached the mysteries of faith with a rational brain and usually arrived at the conclusion that these supernatural elements of the Bible were either misunderstood, exaggerated, or simply made up entirely by the writers.

As I sat and sat with these issues over the last nine months, my faith has been slowly receding, even more so than while entrenched in the things that made me so angry about the history of our deity. But my dirty little secret of a dwindling faith came flying out on a road trip in April of this year. 

Jilly and I took a mini vacation up to Boston to see a show. On the 4+ hour car ride home, she brought up the topic of faith. She had seen me struggling through the Bible first hand for the majority of the prior year, so she was simply checking up on how I was doing with it. My reply was something like "not good" and I went into an explanation of everything that was nagging me and chipping away at the rock-solid faith I once had. As I was pouring out my soul, I had only one hope - that she would respond with "Babe, don't be ridiculous." and reconfirm my faith once and for all. I hoped beyond hope that she had one sentence that would melt my disbelief away. Imagine my surprise when she said:

"I've kinda been feeling the same way."

Initially my heart sank right through the floormats. "This marriage is doomed" I thought. Ever since I started dating seriously, my highest prerequisite for a mate was that she was a strong Christian. I didn't think a relationship could survive without a mutual love for Christ. As we talked, I found out that she had been feeling that way for a while, partially because she witnessed how hard it was on me to read the Bible, and my fears about a doomed marriage were slowly assuaged. It's kinda cool how we separately came to very similar conclusions about faith. These are more or less our shared list of beliefs as they stand now:

• The Bible is an incredible book, and the majority of the contents are worthwhile for anyone to read and follow. In a way, it's an instruction book on how to be a better person, and create a better world around you. However, time spent pouring over every detail is better spent going out and living its message of charity, forgiveness and kindness.
  
  
• God is still a mystery. It's unclear if he exists, and if he does what - if any - influence he has on this world.
  
  
• Jesus walked this earth and lived an exemplary life, maybe a perfect life. A life that should be studied and emulated by everyone on earth. He was kind, selfless, charitable, merciful, but also immeasurably strong in spirit, and unshakably faithful. I believe he was murdered on a cross for his belief that he was saving all of humanity. I will try every day to live a Christ-like existence. However, I currently don't believe he was resurrected from the dead.
  
  
• The Church is still a very valid place. Although I haven't been since Christmas (I swore I'd never become a Christmas/Easter churchgoer, but here I am...) I've had a strong urge to return recently. The aspect of community and sharing and rallying around a common belief that we should be good to each other is something that every human needs.
   
• Christians aren't wrong in their beliefs. God has escaped me, or maybe I escaped God, either way he is currently not a part of my life. That doesn't mean that I think those who believe in him are wrong. If God is real to you, then he is real. To me he's just not right now. But for all I know I'm wrong, and if I am, I'm boned if I die right now.

We essentially laid out the creed of our beliefs right there in the front seat of our 2008 Honda Fit. We even came up with a name for our new found religion: Agnostic Christianity. Essentially living as a Christian would, except being unsure about the supernatural elements. And once we had shared everything we believe, there was a moment of silence. I let the immense weight of my confession fill the compact four-door for what felt like an eternity. Then I let out an immense a sigh of relief, heaved from the bottom of my heart. For the first time in my seven year relationship with my wife, we were equally yolked. We believed the exact same thing with the same level of enthusiasm. The love I felt for her in that moment was possibly the strongest its ever been. And ever since then, we have had a much closer marriage. See? Jesus was right. Equally yolked. Our history as a Christian couple was all over the map. We had both slid up and down the "on fire for God" scale throughout those seven years, first she was dragging me to church, then I, her, then neither of us were dragging anything anywhere.

Whether I knew it or not, my Bible in a Year project was kinda my last ditch effort to reignite my faith. To create a faith in me that would carry over to our marriage and get us both back to dragging each other to church. But it failed. In fact, it backfired. It threw a blanket over the smoldering coals of my belief in all things Christ. And I was afraid to admit any of this, even to myself, until that car ride back in April.

The interesting thing is that my rock-solid faith I had since I was 12 was based on a book I had never read. It was easy to believe when I went to church every week, and retreats twice a year and heard all the amazing things about God, and the incredible sacrifice Jesus made for me. I was surrounded by Christians for my entire faith. I worked in a Christian bookstore, I volunteered at an amazing youth group, I was in a touring Christian band, I had a Christian radio show - literally every aspect of my life was influenced by my belief in God. But when I dug through the Bible, and uncovered all of it's nastiness, and unanswerable questions, and frustrating paradoxes and mind-numbing God-sanctioned genocides, it all fell apart for me.

I'm still bummed about this though. Nine months later, I still get sad that I removed this piece of my life. This piece of me that defined everything about me and influenced every decision I made was ripped from me by the very thing that should have reinforced it - the Good Book. I had a best friend in God for sixteen years. Now it's like I sent him to the moon and he'll never be back, and that is immeasurably saddening.

At the same time though, it's liberating. Not in a "YEE HAW! I'ma go nuts and sin all over the place cuz God can't punish me no more!" kinda way. In fact, I believe that the Bible's definition of what is sinful is still valid. Doings things that are designated as sins are usually bad for you - physically or mentally or both. And confessing those sins to someone - even to yourself - is a good practice. The liberation I'm feeling revolves around my first new bullet point of what I believe - that the Bible should be read, but then lived out. In other words, I don't feel guilty for not reading my Bible every day, or forgetting to pray like I used to for the past sixteen years. Instead I feel energized to go out and do things to help people. And extend kindness beyond measure to everyone in my life.

The last and most important thing: If you are a person of faith, please don't let my failure as a Christian dissuade you from your own beliefs. The last thing I want is the responsibility for ripping God from someone else's life. It's not something I wish on my worst enemy. However, I would encourage all of you to try and read the whole Bible. You base your life around it's teachings, just as I did. It's important to know where those beliefs stem from. So read it, and draw your own conclusions, and let me know what you come up with. Hopefully it's better than where I landed.

I've also not finalized this new creed of mine. I would love for this to be an open discussion. Please comment, tell me I'm wrong. Convince me otherwise. Thanks friends.

Love,
Brandon

THE FINAL POST. Reading from December 31

This is it, folks. The end. The journey of an entire year comes to a climactic conclusion with a record nine posts in one day. And as promised, I finished on January 10 - exactly a year since I began.

This really has been a remarkable experience. I am really happy I decided to blog through my journey instead of just reading through the Bible without recording my thoughts. Doing so has also allowed you guys to comment and help me along in my journey. Specifically I want to give big shout outs to Pete Mitchell, Chris Dela Cruz and Henry Coates who commented regularly and gave me plenty of insight and a lot to think about. I genuinely appreciate all of your thoughtful remarks.

As I've mentioned before, blogging this thing has also allowed me to think and decipher things a little more. I'm sure you've seen this in my writing - I'll think something, write about it, figure something else out while writing the first thing and come up with a new conclusion.

I'm going to take a break after this post is done, but I intend to write a few "prologue" pieces. I want to write my summary of the entire Bible, my definition of God, and address my goals and questions on the right side of the page.

If you have been a regular reader of this thing. Thank you. I hope through this lowly blog you've been able to find some hope or comfort in your own faith, or if you don't believe wisdom and insight into those people who do to gain a better understanding of those around us.

Alright dudes. This is it. The last one.

Reading for December 31
Malachi 3:1-4:6
I think Malachi's placement at the end of the Old Testament is not a mistake. It reminds us that God is not to be effed with. He is a powerful and angry, yet compassionate and loving God. The past few books have focused on God's softer side, while Malachi shows God's anger one last time, with a very important reminder to all who read it.

⁶ “I the LORD do not change. So you, the descendants of Jacob, are not destroyed. ⁷ Ever since the time of your ancestors you have turned away from my decrees and have not kept them. Return to me, and I will return to you,” says the LORD Almighty.

Throughout this whole thing, I have theorized that God changed at some point. His heart softened and he became more compassionate and loving to his creations. This statement squashes that theory. Now this could be God simply trying to keep his street cred, but I believe him. I think both sides of God that we see are always part of him. He has a bitter anger inside of him that is swelled and ignited by sin, but he also has an incomprehensible amount of patience and love for his people. Both of these live within him at all times, he just lets one side come out at some point and the other side at others.

Even here, in the midst of God's firey, anger fueled rant, he offers salvation to his people. "Return to me and I will return to you."

The Old Testament, the Torah, closes with these three verses.

 ⁴ “Remember the law of my servant Moses, the decrees and laws I gave him at Horeb for all Israel.
 ⁵ “See, I will send the prophet Elijah to you before that great and dreadful day of the LORD comes. ⁶ He will turn the hearts of the parents to their children, and the hearts of the children to their parents; or else I will come and strike the land with total destruction.”

The most important things God could say to his people are as follows:
1) Remember the Ten Commandments
2) A savior is coming
3) Obey him or I'm going to destroy everything

And the Old Testament is complete.


Revelation 22:1-21
Wow. A pretty controversial conclusion to the Bible.

It begins with the final pieces of the new earth, the section is titled "Eden restored" bringing the entire Bible ful circle, allowing God and his people to experience the plan that existed for a brief moment and took millenia to get back.

³ No longer will there be any curse. The throne of God and of the Lamb will be in the city, and his servants will serve him. ⁴ They will see his face, and his name will be on their foreheads. ⁵ There will be no more night. They will not need the light of a lamp or the light of the sun, for the Lord God will give them light. And they will reign for ever and ever.

Awesome.

The writer, John, then pulls back, talking about himself and the angel who showed him these visions. There is a conversation between John and the angel where the angel tells him not to bow to him as he began to, because they are both equal servants of God. Then the angel says something really, really strange for the Bible - if he knew he was gonna be at the very end of the Bible, I'm sure he would have chosen his words more carefully.

¹¹ Let the one who does wrong continue to do wrong; let the vile person continue to be vile; let the one who does right continue to do right; and let the holy person continue to be holy.”

Aren't we called to correct our brothers and sisters and point them in the right direction when they're headed in the wrong one? Is this some selfish plot to let fewer people into heaven, or to insure that you'll be one of the 144,000? I don't know.

Finally, here is the conclusion to the New Testament, and thus the Bible.

²⁰ He who testifies to these things says, “Yes, I am coming soon.”
   Amen. Come, Lord Jesus.
 ²¹ The grace of the Lord Jesus be with God’s people. Amen.

Such awesome peace in those words. Like I could just wrap myself in them on a cold day with a cup of soup. So great.


Psalm 150:1-6
The end of Pslam calls us to praise God at all times and in all ways and for all reasons.

¹ Praise the LORD.^[a]
   Praise God in his sanctuary;
   praise him in his mighty heavens.
² Praise him for his acts of power;
   praise him for his surpassing greatness.
³ Praise him with the sounding of the trumpet,
   praise him with the harp and lyre,
⁴ praise him with timbrel and dancing,
   praise him with the strings and pipe,
⁵ praise him with the clash of cymbals,
   praise him with resounding cymbals.
 ⁶ Let everything that has breath praise the LORD.
   Praise the LORD.

Indeed. Praise the Lord.

Proverbs 31:25-31
The end of Proverbs is actually the conclusion of the prologue of the ideal wife. Here's a snippet.

³⁰ Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting;
   but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised.
³¹ Honor her for all that her hands have done,
   and let her works bring her praise at the city gate.  

Its funny that Solomon chose to put this at the end. There is a whole section devoted to watching out for adulterous and seductive women, to have this vision of a beautiful, loving, intelligent strong woman for a wife is the complete antithesis of that idea. And I believe its what I have in my wife.

I did it. I can't believe it. I did it.

Dear God, 

Wow, what a journey it has been. I have learned so much about you and your people. I have learned to fear you and love you in equal amounts. I have learned how to be an ideal person, and how to be an ideal servant of God. I feel like I have learned I lifetime's worth of information and knowledge.

Thank you so much for your word. It is joyous to read and I pray that others were able to find a similar joy to the experience through my work here. 

God, thank you. Thank you for giving me the will to persevere through this - it wasn't easy at times but I am rapturously happy that I did. I feel like a more complete person. 

Thank you. Thank you. 

In Jesus Holy name I pray,
Amen. 

Reading from Thursday, December 30

Oh man. Two away...

Reading for December 30
Malachi 1:1-2:17
Hey, new book! This is the last time I'll say that. Sad face.

Whoa. So much for the "new God". As we've neared the end of the Old Testament, we have begun to see God's heart softening. Not caring about ritualistic sacrifices, but rather seeking the heart of his people. Wishing for his people to be kind to one another, and fair in their judgments.

Here in Malachi, we see a God obsessed with ritualistic sacrifice, and the quality of the sacrifice - he seems even more adamant than he did in Leviticus and Deuteronomy.

   “It is you priests who show contempt for my name.
   “But you ask, ‘How have we shown contempt for your name?’
 ⁷ “By offering defiled food on my altar.
   “But you ask, ‘How have we defiled you?’
   “By saying that the LORD’s table is contemptible. ⁸ When you offer blind animals for sacrifice, is that not wrong? When you sacrifice lame or diseased animals, is that not wrong? Try offering them to your governor! Would he be pleased with you? Would he accept you?” says the LORD Almighty.
 ⁹ “Now plead with God to be gracious to us. With such offerings from your hands, will he accept you?”—says the LORD Almighty.

Wow, reading that I actually feel like I'm being yelled at - even though I have never offered a bad animal to God. Although, there is a lesson to learn here, even in modern times. While we may not sacrifice animals to God anymore, we are still called to give of our time and money. And where it seems these people have failed by simply giving because they're compelled to, and giving the least amount they can, we too have done the same. At least I have - I feel that I am called to give my time and money to God, and most of the time, these are token gestures, or just the change in my pocket when I have $20 in my wallet I'm saving for a Gameboy game. 

I'm reminded of the Simpson's ep when Homer put a coupon for "Shake and Bake" in the collection tray at church - responding to Marge's disappointment with "Marge, we can spare it - we've been blessed."

It goes on...

 ¹³ Another thing you do: You flood the LORD’s altar with tears. You weep and wail because he no longer looks with favor on your offerings or accepts them with pleasure from your hands. ¹⁴ You ask, “Why?” It is because the LORD is the witness between you and the wife of your youth. You have been unfaithful to her, though she is your partner, the wife of your marriage covenant.
 ¹⁵ Has not the one God made you? You belong to him in body and spirit. And what does the one God seek? Godly offspring.^[e] So be on your guard, and do not be unfaithful to the wife of your youth.

Now in now way am I condoning adultery, I think this tough stance on it is perfectly fair. It's just not the patient, gentle being that God had seemed to evolve into as the Old Testament progressed.

And yes, I realize the irony of using the word "evolve" there.

Revelation 21:1-27
This is the resounding orchestra fanfare at the end of the whole thing. Everything and everyone is at pure peace and there is not even a glimpse of suffering - this is the image God had designed from the very beginning of his creation.

 ¹ Then I saw “a new heaven and a new earth,”^[a] for the first heaven and the first earth had passed away, and there was no longer any sea. ² I saw the Holy City, the new Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven from God, prepared as a bride beautifully dressed for her husband. ³ And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, “Look! God’s dwelling place is now among the people, and he will dwell with them. They will be his people, and God himself will be with them and be their God. ⁴ ‘He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death’^[b] or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.”

What can you say about something like that? It's incredible - especially after the terrifying, tortuous images from the previous chapters. This is the hope of every believer, this is where we yearn to end up, under the rule of God alone, with no evil or influence of evil anywhere in the world. It will be like in Return of the Jedi when they finally destroy the Empire once and for all and the entire galaxy is at peace.

Sorry, I just watched those movies for the first time this week, and they were amazing.

I know, I know - "gasp gasp he's never seen Star Wars before? But he's such a nerd!" I've seen it now and I love it like the rest of you.

The chapter concludes with a vision of the New Jerusalem. Remember that the original Jerusalem had been destroyed by the Babylonians so the readers of this must have been totally stoked to hear the stats laid out here. It is to be 1,400 miles wide in both directions with walls 200 feet thick.

The chapter ends with these words which I can do no better justice to than copy paste

 ²² I did not see a temple in the city, because the Lord God Almighty and the Lamb are its temple. ²³ The city does not need the sun or the moon to shine on it, for the glory of God gives it light, and the Lamb is its lamp. ²⁴ The nations will walk by its light, and the kings of the earth will bring their splendor into it. ²⁵ On no day will its gates ever be shut, for there will be no night there. ²⁶ The glory and honor of the nations will be brought into it. ²⁷ Nothing impure will ever enter it, nor will anyone who does what is shameful or deceitful, but only those whose names are written in the Lamb’s book of life.

How incredible is that first verse? For the entirety of the history of Jerusalem, and even further back to the nomadic Israelites, God's presence was contained within something. A tent, a cloud, the temple, he was never really willing to make his presence part of his people. In this new vision, there is no temple, only God. How awesome is that? 

Psalm 149:1-9
This sounds like the new earth...

² Let Israel rejoice in their Maker;
   let the people of Zion be glad in their King.
³ Let them praise his name with dancing
   and make music to him with timbrel and harp.
⁴ For the LORD takes delight in his people;
   he crowns the humble with victory.
⁵ Let his faithful people rejoice in this honor
   and sing for joy on their beds.

Proverbs 31:10-24
This section is headlined with "Epilogue: The wife of noble character" It basically outlines the ideal wife from the author's point of view. It's actually really long for a Proverb reading, so I won't post the whole thing here, but it basically says that the woman is kind to others, compassionate with the poor and needy, a provider of income for the household, and an all around good woman. If you go back and read it, you'll notice that it says nothing about submissiveness to the husband nor does it paint the wife as the less important partner. Rather, it appears that the wife is equal with the husband, doing her share and carrying a portion of the burden of the household.

Reading from Wednesday, December 29

Post 363.

Reading for December 29
Zechariah 14:1-21
Okay, this sounds like the day of Babylon's invasion and destruction of Jerusalem. Which I thought had already occurred at the time of this writing.

¹ A day of the LORD is coming, Jerusalem, when your possessions will be plundered and divided up within your very walls.  ² I will gather all the nations to Jerusalem to fight against it; the city will be captured, the houses ransacked, and the women raped. Half of the city will go into exile, but the rest of the people will not be taken from the city.

But then it goes on to talk about another day which appears to be the day of Christ's crucifixion.

Then the LORD my God will come, and all the holy ones with him.
 ⁶ On that day there will be neither sunlight nor cold, frosty darkness. ⁷ It will be a unique day—a day known only to the LORD—with no distinction between day and night. When evening comes, there will be light.
 ⁸ On that day living water will flow out from Jerusalem, half of it east to the Dead Sea and half of it west to the Mediterranean Sea, in summer and in winter.

Remember when Jesus died, the day turned to night immediately, and that Jesus referred to himself as the living water. Then it closes with the beautiful image of this water flowing in both directions eternally.

Then...it turns kinda nasty...

 ¹² This is the plague with which the LORD will strike all the nations that fought against Jerusalem: Their flesh will rot while they are still standing on their feet, their eyes will rot in their sockets, and their tongues will rot in their mouths. ¹³ On that day people will be stricken by the LORD with great panic. They will seize each other by the hand and attack one another. ¹⁴ Judah too will fight at Jerusalem. The wealth of all the surrounding nations will be collected—great quantities of gold and silver and clothing. ¹⁵ A similar plague will strike the horses and mules, the camels and donkeys, and all the animals in those camps.

So Zechariah appears to contain prophecies about present future and way future times - namely the invasion of Jerusalem, the life and death of Jesus and the end times described in Revelation. He had a heavy task indeed.


Revelation 20:1-15
The aftermath of the battle.

So here's what happens. Jesus defeats Satan and throws him into hell. He is bound in hell for 1000 years. Meanwhile, those who died for the name of God during these end times were resurrected and ruled the earth with Jesus for those 1000 years.


After those thousand years, Satan returns to get one last go at causing pain and misery in the world, at this he fails and is once again cast into the "lake of fire" where he will be tortured forever. Then all of the dead who had not yet been resurrected, were placed in judgment before God. If their names were not written in that book of life, they were sent to hell with Satan to be tortured forever as well.

This is the clearest picture of Hell that we have in the Bible and it is a very popular one, though very few other books mention it. Jesus kinda glances over the topic, but focuses more on the kingdom of God which he claims is to come. Zechariah, while fairly accurate about his prophecies of Jesus, had a few errors here and there. I'm not saying not to believe this text, but I'm just trying to put some context around it.

Psalm 148:1-14
We are all meant to praise God and receive his love

¹¹ kings of the earth and all nations,
   you princes and all rulers on earth,
¹² young men and women,
   old men and children.  ¹³ Let them praise the name of the LORD,
   for his name alone is exalted;
   his splendor is above the earth and the heavens.

Although he does mention a special group of people

¹⁴ And he has raised up for his people a horn,^[b]
   the praise of all his faithful servants,
   of Israel, the people close to his heart.

Proverbs 31:8-9

 ⁸ Speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves,
   for the rights of all who are destitute.
⁹ Speak up and judge fairly;
   defend the rights of the poor and needy.

Yes yes and yes. 

Reading from Tuesday, December 28

Only four to go, yo.

Reading for December 28
Zechariah 12:1-13:9
More specific prophecies about Jesus.

¹⁰ “And I will pour out on the house of David and the inhabitants of Jerusalem a spirit^[a] of grace and supplication. They will look on^[b] me, the one they have pierced, and they will mourn for him as one mourns for an only child, and grieve bitterly for him as one grieves for a firstborn son.

And...

 ¹ “On that day a fountain will be opened to the house of David and the inhabitants of Jerusalem, to cleanse them from sin and impurity.

Some seriously hopeful images there. Again, remember the original audience who would be reading this. 

Revelation 19:1-21

The second half of this chapter opens with a description of the 'future Jesus' for lack of a better phrase.

¹² His eyes are like blazing fire, and on his head are many crowns. He has a name written on him that no one knows but he himself. ¹³ He is dressed in a robe dipped in blood, and his name is the Word of God. [...] ¹⁵ Coming out of his mouth is a sharp sword with which to strike down the nations. “He will rule them with an iron scepter.”^[a] He treads the winepress of the fury of the wrath of God Almighty. ¹⁶ On his robe and on his thigh he has this name written:

 KING OF KINGS AND LORD OF LORDS.

I think this is the guy the Jews were expecting when the humble carpenter's son came around claiming his own divinity. I don't think anyone would have denied that this guy was holy. He's freaking terrifying. 

Then we have the big final battle between Jesus and Satan. It's pretty epic. Check it out.

 ¹⁹ Then I saw the beast and the kings of the earth and their armies gathered together to wage war against the rider on the horse and his army. ²⁰ But the beast was captured, and with it the false prophet who had performed the signs on its behalf. With these signs he had deluded those who had received the mark of the beast and worshiped its image. The two of them were thrown alive into the fiery lake of burning sulfur. ²¹ The rest were killed with the sword coming out of the mouth of the rider on the horse, and all the birds gorged themselves on their flesh. 

Damn. I know its complete blasphemy here, but can I get a hell yeah?

Psalm 147:1-20
This was my image of God for pretty much my whole life up until this point.

³ He heals the brokenhearted
   and binds up their wounds.
⁴ He determines the number of the stars
   and calls them each by name.
⁵ Great is our Lord and mighty in power;
   his understanding has no limit.

While I still believe he is those things, he is so much more complex than even that. 

Proverbs 31:1-7
Hmm...interesting perspective on alcohol consumption...

 ⁴ It is not for kings, Lemuel—
   it is not for kings to drink wine,
   not for rulers to crave beer,
⁵ lest they drink and forget what has been decreed,
   and deprive all the oppressed of their rights.
⁶ Let beer be for those who are perishing,
   wine for those who are in anguish!
⁷ Let them drink and forget their poverty
   and remember their misery no more.

Reading from Monday, December 27

Gettin close, son.

Reading for December 27
Zechariah 10:1-11:17
OK. Chapters ten and eleven couldn't be further from each other with regards to content. Chapter ten is about as hopeful as any chapter in the Bible as God begins speaking of the forgiveness he will give to his people.

⁶ “I will strengthen Judah
   and save the tribes of Joseph.
I will restore them
   because I have compassion on them.
They will be as though
   I had not rejected them,
for I am the LORD their God
   and I will answer them.

What a rapturous image. Especially for the readers of the time - remember this was written (I think) during the Jews exile when Babylon had come in and destroyed Jerusalem and rousted the Jews from their homeland, and enslaving those who were left behind. According to the scripture, God was solely responsible for this occurring and the Jews likely believed this to be 100% true. Now to hear that God has had a change of heart, that he is going to be compassionate, that it will be as if he "had not rejected them", must have been like water in a desert.

Chapter eleven starts with an image of Jesus that quickly turns sour.

⁷ So I shepherded the flock marked for slaughter, particularly the oppressed of the flock. Then I took two staffs and called one Favor and the other Union, and I shepherded the flock. ⁸ In one month I got rid of the three shepherds.

OK so far. Jesus helped the oppressed and embarrassed the oppressors - no problem there. But then...

  The flock detested me, and I grew weary of them ⁹ and said, “I will not be your shepherd. Let the dying die, and the perishing perish. Let those who are left eat one another’s flesh.”
 ¹⁰ Then I took my staff called Favor and broke it, revoking the covenant I had made with all the nations. ¹¹ It was revoked on that day, and so the oppressed of the flock who were watching me knew it was the word of the LORD.

Uh oh...that doesn't sound like Jesus at all. But then we have this to make it even more confusing...

 ¹² I told them, “If you think it best, give me my pay; but if not, keep it.” So they paid me thirty pieces of silver.
 ¹³ And the LORD said to me, “Throw it to the potter”—the handsome price at which they valued me! So I took the thirty pieces of silver and threw them to the potter at the house of the LORD.

Thirty pieces of silver is the same price that Judas was paid to betray Jesus, and then he bought the "potters field" with the money. And subsequently killed himself on said field. So could this text be from the point of view of Judas? Interesting...



Revelation 18:1-24
Now we seem to be getting some clarification. It appears that the plagues that were dished out were meant for Babylon - the nation which destroyed Jerusalem and enslaved the Jews.

 ⁴ Then I heard another voice from heaven say:   

 “‘Come out of [Babylon], my people,’^[b]
   so that you will not share in her sins,
   so that you will not receive any of her plagues;
⁵ for her sins are piled up to heaven,
   and God has remembered her crimes.
⁶ Give back to her as she has given;
   pay her back double for what she has done.
   Pour her a double portion from her own cup.

Right? Doesn't that sound like God is trying to rescue the believers from the destruction beset upon B-Lon? The question now is - does this still mean strictly Babylon, or is it symbolic for the most powerful nation of the time which oppresses Israel or God's people? Uh oh...

Psalm 146:1-10
Yeah! Re-remember? Remember God is good! Honestly, its a real blessing to have the Psalms to read back to back with Revelation.

⁶ He is the Maker of heaven and earth,
   the sea, and everything in them—
   he remains faithful forever.
⁷ He upholds the cause of the oppressed
   and gives food to the hungry.
The LORD sets prisoners free,
 ⁸ the LORD gives sight to the blind,
the LORD lifts up those who are bowed down,
   the LORD loves the righteous.
⁹ The LORD watches over the foreigner
   and sustains the fatherless and the widow,
   but he frustrates the ways of the wicked.

Proverbs 30:33

³³ For as churning cream produces butter,
   and as twisting the nose produces blood,
   so stirring up anger produces strife.” 

Take that, political media crazies.